Dear Tenerife* Restaurant Owners and Managers,
(*Insert other resort here where applicable)
I would like to take this opportunity to chat to you about your “greeters” or “PRs” or “Front of House Staff” or whatever term you use. Personally, I call them nuisances. And this is the polite term. I would like to make some suggestions on how NOT to lure me into your restaurant
- Chase me down the road
- Lay your hands on me
- Bully me or harass me, or insult me in your language. I know from the tone if not the actual words.
- Continue talking after I’ve politely said “no thanks”
- Tell me that I won’t be disappointed. You are setting me up to be disappointed.
- Promise me free stuff. Let the free stuff be a surprise
- Tell me that you offer the best Mexican food in Tenerife whilst wearing a sombrero and waving around a stuffed donkey. I immediately do not trust you
- Tell me that you offer the best anything in Tenerife. Let me be the judge of that.
- Have pictures of your food outside
- Have a large blackboard offering a full English breakfast or Sunday roast. I am in Tenerife. Give me tapas, paella and fresh seafood
- Be McDonald’s or Burger King or Subway
- Treat me like an adult who can read a menu and make my own decision about where and what i eat. Simple.
Yours, most respectfully
Mrs A Brummie Home and Abroad
*Insert other resort here where applicable